P.S. I love you

Tucked away in the heart of the city, stood a 15-storeyed building. It was nothing short of a miracle, finding a house in Mumbai that was right in the middle of the city, yet completely removed from the daily hubbub. A meticulous garden plantation, a tiny playground furnished with a swing, a see-saw, and a roundabout, and a view from the 14th floor made for an ideal living situation. Aarav had finally done it; he had realised his long-standing dream of buying a house. But that did not make him nearly as happy as the fact that Veera had agreed to pay a visit today. He found himself smiling for no apparent reason the entire day. The house was spotless, but he could not stop fidgeting — he kept cleaning and re-cleaning surfaces, fluffing the pillows and re-arranging drinks on the table. He had never been this nervous and yet he loved how flustered she made him feel.

He had met Veera only 9 months ago when she joined Brietleg Bank as the Head of Wealth Management. She had a girl-next-door charm and was stunningly intelligent. She had a strong presence that could not be missed and an infectious laughter you couldn’t help join in. It was no wonder then that Aarav had fallen ridiculously in love with her. But, pretending they were just friends was easier.

They had become friends thanks only owing to a well-meaning 50-year old HR colleague called Rosaline. She had been trying to fix up Aarav with a ‘nice girl’ for ages and when she met Veera, she thought to herself ‘Finally!’ — she was going to save Aarav from a loveless lonely life. She had rushed one afternoon to Aarav’s tiny cabin, almost shouting “You must meet Veera…You and her would compliment eachother like milk and tea.” She dragged him along for lunch with her that afternoon.

While most days Aarav found Rosaline quite irritating and nosy, she seemed to have got it right this time. He was almost immediately stumped by Veera’s spunk and humour. He could not stop thinking of her and kept reminiscing about the most boring and casual conversations they would have every day. He had learnt her likes and dislikes by now, and knew her peculiar habits like they were his own — she stuck out her tongue when concentrating too hard, and played with her golden ring every time she was nervous.

He greatly valued her professional opinion and they had quickly become out-of-office friends the moment they discovered a mutual love for running. For Aarav, it was a complete whirlwind and an alien feeling — even an accidental touch would set his skin on fire.

‘Wow, look at her go!’ Aarav thought to himself as he watched Veera run. He just loved how spontaneous and competitive she was. While the morning run was supposed to be relaxing, she would inadvertantly turn it into a competition. She tried to outrun him everyday and succeeded on most. Initially, Aarav indulged her running competitions and participated with complete vigour and intent to win. But, these past few months had been different. He barely put any effort in beating her; he preferred watching her run and the pure joy that spread across her face every time she won.

Ever since he was about 15 years old, Aarav had found running to be extremely comforting. It was the key to his concentration and focus. After trying several other anxiety management techniques, he had realised running worked the best. He had been running for almost 15 years now and every morning had felt similar — unexciting and mechanical. But, the last six months had been different for he had found a partner for his daily run. The morning run had now become the favourite part of his day. World seemed different, more colourful, more jubilant and easier since he met her.

Several lunches, evening hangouts and official trips later, Aarav had found a true friend in Veera…perhaps a little more than a friend. He had spent enough nights tossing and turning in bed over the last few weeks, thinking about Veera and mustering up the courage to confess his feelings to her. It was becoming more and more difficult to go on pretending…the threat of him imploding was becoming real by the day. He would have confessed his love for her ages ago (god knows he was practically bursting at the seams), but there was just one tiny problem — the Husband.

He knew it was quite wrong, seeking out a married woman like that. But, he had foolishly convinced his deluded self that she reciprocated his feelings. The hair-twirling, the constant smiling and the casual arm-touching had to have meant something — something more than friendship.

After quarreling with himself, he had finally made a decision. He was going to tell Veera he was head over heels in love with her and the new house was the perfect set up for this confession. So there he was, waiting nervously for Veera to show up at his (new) doorstep.

He sprung to action as soon as the bell rang. She squealed with joy and threw her arms around him, congratulating him over his newest acquisition. She handed him a bottle of wine and some sweets to celebrate the new house. She peeked inside expectantly to see other office friends at the housewarming party, but was surprised to see no one in the house. ‘It’s past 9 pm, how am I the first one here?’ she thought to herself. He showed her around the house, beaming with joy and awaiting her seal of approval.

Unexpectedly, he asked her “Do you remember the first time we met eachother.”

“Of course! It was at that lunch with Rosaline. It was my first week at work,” she said.

“Nope! It was a Tuesday, your first day at work, about 8:45 am…we both got into the lift…you were wearing a navy blue skirt and a peach top…you seemed a little nervous, so I smiled at you and wished you good morning,” he said.

Veera smiled cluelessly at him, puzzled over the purpose of this walk down the memory lane.

“Oh really. I don’t remember. Where is everyone else? Did I come too early or too late?,” she said, smiling uncomfortably.

“Oh well truth be told, I haven’t called anyone else. It’s just you!” he said.

As Aarav droned on about their first meet, loud sirens started sounding off in Veera’s brain at this revelation. She wasn’t yet sure why, but a creepy discomfort crawled onto her. She could not focus anymore, feeling like a fish removed out of its habitat.

“Well, you see there is something important I wanted to tell you and I am quite sure you feel the same. It might be difficult to accept, but just hear me out. I have only known you for a short time, but I am absolutely in love with you and I want to be with you,” he said in a matter of fact way, as if it was a truth everyone, but Veera, was aware of.

She just kept staring at him, like the wind had been knocked out of her and then suddenly burst into loud laughter at what was obviously a prank. Watching his expression remain unchanged, she became grim and blurted out, “But I am happily married.”

He recounted several memories as evidence that she reciprocated his feelings, while Veera just watched him, her eyes wide with horror. She did not even remember half the incidences he had recalled for her. Despite her repeated rebuffs, he kept pressing her to accept that she loved him too.

“I DON’T LOVE YOU. I AM VERY HAPPY WITH MY HUSBAND AND I HAVE NEVER THOUGHT OF YOU AS ANYTHING BUT A FRIEND,” she screamed and turned on her heels to leave.

She was the last piece of the puzzle — he had a good job, a good car, a good home — all that remained was an ideal life partner. As he watched her turn away to leave, his dream of an ideal life started to disintegrate right infront of his eyes. Before he even knew it, he picked up the knife lying on the table, held her from behind and slit her throat with one clean swipe. She fell to the ground, writhing in pain, life leaving her body and he simply stared at her with numbness and indifference, mumbling to himself, “You just had to say Yes!”